Monday, February 2, 2009

What a weekend...

This one was all over the map. Friday night wasn't anything special. We just hung around the house, putting around.

The highlight of Saturday was a signing I attended at the Comic Stop in Lynnwood. I was lucky enough to meet Michael Avon Oeming, his wife Taki, their dog Fry, and Brian Glass as well. I showed up with about an hour left in the signing and luckily I was the only one at the table. It always seems a bit awkward when I walk up to artists, writers, and whomever at these signings. You want to talk to them and say "hi," you want to talk about their books, their past, what they are working on now, and what is coming up, but in the back of your mind you know they have been asked these questions 1000 times, and although they smile and put on a good front, you know they would rather be swimming in raw sewage with paper cuts over their entire body than have to hear "I really like your work, how long have you been drawing (or writing, or inking, etc.)?" Here is how I imagine it goes for the person on the other side of the table:

Geek: Hey (insert name here)! How is it going? I really like your work on (insert book name here)!

Artist: Thanks [dipshit]. I like working on it [I like getting a paycheck, unlike you, you slob].

Geek: How long have you been drawing?

Artist: Oh, I started when I was about 9 or 10 [about the same time as you quit wetting the bed].

Geek: Cool! How long have you been drawing ________?

Artist: Oh, I started about a year ago [about the same time you showered last. Doesn't anyone read Wikipedia for Christs sake?!?].

Geek: That is cool. I wish I could work in comics. That must be awesome!

Artist: It is, I really enjoy it [I enjoy women too, which makes two things we will NEVER have in common].

Geek: That's cool. Here, I brought the last 57 issues you worked on for you to sign.

Artist: Wow. Great. Thanks. [Fucking eBay is going to be flooded with this shit. I wonder if he will notice that I am signing with my other hand.]

10 minutes later

Geek: Thanks man. Have a good day.

Artist: No problem [thanks for standing down wind].

Geek #2: Hey (insert name here)! How is it going? I really like your work on (insert book name here)!

Artist: Thanks [oh God, someone shoot me]. I like working on it [work is obviously something you know nothing about]....... and so on.

Everyone at the table was great, but you could just see something in Michael's eyes. I don't know if it was boredom, contempt, or just indigestion.

I did pull the ultimate fan boy stunt and brought my own sketchbook (it was blank - I have NO artistic skill) in for Michael to draw in. Michael kindly obliged my request for a quick sketch - the premise was that Stan Lee never made it as a comic book God, instead he ended up fronting a band. Pick a decade, pick a genre and draw Stan as he would look as the front man. Ten minutes later I had a drawing of Stan circa 1977 with the porn moustache and big specs on. It looks sweet. I may try this at the Emerald City Comic Convention. We'll see how far I get and who throws the book back at me.

Sunday - Super Bowl.

Everyone kept asking me who I wanted to win the game.

I told them "I want the Steelers to lose."

"So you want the Cardinals to win." they would say.

"No, I just want the Steelers to lose."

"But they are playing the Cardinals."

"Yes they are."

"So, if you want the Steelers to lose, you want the Cardinals to win!"

"Not necessarily. I just want the Steelers to lose. I don't give a rats ass who beats them, I just want them to lose."

"But, they are playing the Cardinals...."

You get the picture. Apparently my logic was lost on most everyone.

Damn Steelers.

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